In a move that can only be labeled as a love letter repackaged in environmental lipstick for the Big Oil, the Biden administration has outlined plans for three more offshore leases over the next five years, effectively making zero strides in facing the urgent threat of climate change. Because, let’s be honest, nothing screams “climate crisis emergency!” like keeping the welcome mat rolled out for Big Oil. Under the eponymous guise of "progress," Biden’s administration seems to have one foot marvelously lodged in a treaty to combat climate change, while the other seems to be tap dancing to the beat of the fossil fuel industry. Petrol is the new green, apparently - but of course, green here doesn’t refer to renewable energy initiatives, but rather, the color of the dollar bills that line big corporations’ pockets. The Interior Department's Bureau of Ocean Energy Management (BOEM) - even their name makes them sound strategically vague - revealed the plan. According to these hush-hush memos that have been mysteriously surfacing, the department plans to propose its lease sale as soon as Jan. 2023, including areas in the Gulf of Mexico and off the coast of Alaska. Because, why stop at endangering human life when you can potentially disrupt delicate marine ecosystems and the indigenous communities too? So, what about all those promises made, all that beautiful rhetoric touted at marathon climate conferences, BINGO nights for the environmentally-concerned? Remember, the one about "commitment to ensuring the Interior Department’s decisions are guided by the best-available science and that they honor tribal sovereignty and conserve public lands and waters for future generations to enjoy"? Seems to have been left out in the cold, or perhaps more aptly, out in the global warming. Clearly, the administration’s definition of “best-available science” includes boosting Big Oil, not bolstering the actual science that might save the polar ice caps from turning into the world’s most depressing swimming pool. And to the naïve optimist who still wonders, "Surely these leases will include stringent, robust measures for environmental conservation and oversight?" - Bless your heart! “Rigorous environmental analysis and public engagement,” the plan informs us, will be employed. In translation, more empty words and less noticeable action will become the standard procedure. As we painstakingly clear the thick smokescreen of unfulfilled promises, we realize it wasn't 'The Road Not Taken' that Biden was referring to, but rather 'The Pipeline Well-Paved.' So, the midnight oil will continue to be burned, quite literally, and possibly at both ends. And while our signing pens are unconcernedly dancing around oil treaties, the threat of climate change is knocking on the door, increasingly impatient. But who has time to answer that when the siren song of Big Oil is playing far too seductively in the background?