In a stunning twist of the ongoing 'kiss-gate' scandal, the Spanish Football Association (RFEF) is swapping cleats for court briefs as they threaten legal action against their wayward World Cup winning squad. 39 players have refused to dust off their jerseys unless substantial changes are made in the association embroiled in controversy. And let's be real - who can blame them for longing for a stretch limo, snazzy designer outfits, and at least a reality TV show after winning the Women's World Cup? Isn’t that what being a world champion is all about? Unfortunately for RFEF, they seem to believe this is more of a game of hide-and-seek than a protest, and are determined to sue them to bring them back – because that's exactly how you resolve disputes, right? Who needs healthy dialogue, mediation or systemic reform when you've got mad lawyer skills up your sleeve? The body, beloved by all for their subtlety and willingness to play fair, claimed, "Our soccer balls are fully pumped and ready to roll, and roll they shall!" Adding wryly, "We've got the BEST legal team - Resilient, Expert, Fair, and Friends (R.E.F.F). Surely, with all those Fs, it’s bound to land us an ‘A’ or might as well a cup!" Meanwhile, a rogue RFEF ex-mascot turned whistleblower expressed his support for the players. "It's about time someone pumped the breaks on this runaway 'bullet-train-weight-on-your-shoulders' administration. They think suing is their yellow card to the players? It's more likely to be their red!" While the players continue their revolt, the RFEF is scrambling to find a squad of lawyers agile enough to fill in as their absent players. They’ve even proposed a new tagline for the summer league – 'Legal Leagues,' where only lawyers caught offside can be penalized by flipping through FIFA's rulebook. Definitely not the match we expected, but it’s starting to look more and more like a match we’d pay to see. Unfortunately, for these 39 errant players, the kickoff they were hoping for is looking more like a kickoff in court. But hey, who knows? Maybe it will end up being less penalty shootout, more courtroom drama. Either way, viewers are sure to be on the edge of their seats!