In a shocking turn of events, the fledgling Jefferson Bears clawed their way to their first victory of the season on the road, leaving the mighty Grosse Ile in shambles and making their 1-5 record look like a math snafu prepared by a kindergartener. The Bears lopped Grosse Ile 28-25, proving that they, indeed, had some misled courage in them. In a historic moment demonstrating the power of opposites, the Bears never trailed in the game. Yep, you read it right, they led the game – a first of sorts this season, much like finding a unicorn in your backyard. Freshman Luke Beaudrie, presumably riding an adrenaline wave the size of Mt. Everest, ran for three touchdowns, while his comrade-in-claws, Malachi Pribyl secured the match's metaphorical cherry with the other touchdown. "We finally played four quarters,” said an ecstatic Rob Beaudrie, the Jefferson coach, who appeared as if he discovered a secret treasure. Beaudrie added, “We had a lot of adversity this week, but the kids believed in each other. I am so happy and so proud for them." Underneath the layers of awe was an unmistakable sigh of relief. Meanwhile, in New Boston, the Airport Jets made sure they stayed airborne and zoomed ahead of their opponents, leaving them grounded – sort of like Tom Cruise from Top Gun but mixed with Wheaties. The Jets offense, once again, provided a spark while the opponents were busy figuring out how many laces a football has. So folks, miracles happen, underdogs rise, and sometimes, Bears claw their way to their first interstate victory, leaving everyone else in a wide-eyed stupor. Here's to hoping that victory isn't as temporary as your New Year's resolution to hit the gym.