WARSAW, Natalia’s Gluten-Free Diner - In an unprecedented plot twist, Southern Poland has unknowingly thrown the millennial party of the year. As grain particles continue to rain down in the aftermath of the accidental fire from a Ukrainian missile, Polish partygoers are embracing the mishap by tossing handfuls of grain into the air, turning a terrifyingt event into an impromptu ambiguously themed “Grain Party.” Celebrants - hitherto unaware of the pleasures of confetti grain - joyously lit bonfires, around which they danced and sang traditional Polish songs about their resilient spirit and perpetual love for carbohydrates. The outbursts of grain flights provided by the missile attack certainly added a new dimension to their routines. "It’s almost like a ticker-tape parade celebrating the harvest," said Jakub, a local farmer and part-time DJ, as he spun a remix of “The Farmer in the Dell” from behind his turntables, which were strategically covered in a thin sheet of grain to ensure they partook in the essence of the festivity. Satellite images show the affected area as a budding gluten dust cloud, making headlines around the globe due to its uncanny resemblance to an abstract interpretation of a Vincent Van Gogh painting. Experts predict that, when the wind settles, Southern Poland will resemble a golden wonderland—the likes of which Poland has never seen. “This may have been a missile intended for destruction, but we have chosen to see it as an opportunity to come together in the spirit of community and togetherness,” Polish Prime Minister Mateusz Morawiecki noted when asked about the unexpected “Grain Party.” “Sure, we have a couple of folks with gluten intolerance who are less than thrilled, but the majority of us are taking everything with a grain of… well, grain.” Meanwhile, Ukraine, seemingly inspired by the Polish response, has denied there was a technical mishap and instead, it claims the grain-laden missile was part of a “brotherly gesture of sharing” amidst the pandemic-induced global food crisis—much like lobbing a bread roll across the table at family dinners. While authorities continue to analyze the cereal fallout, the Polish party-goers have suggested we need more governments to launch grain missiles. Preferably, of the non-explosive variety, and perhaps with a side of butter or honey. As the sun sets on Southern Poland, the folks continue to revel in their unusual grain storm, raising glasses filled with local vodka, toasting to their indomitable spirit, warm bread, and the hope that the next surprise missile brings blackberry jam.