Under the banner of "Groundbreaking New Strategy Parr-Tay," Hamas has officially unveiled their terrifyingly innovative Stop, Flight, and Blame Game plan. Yes, you heard it right. Forget about escape rooms, folks. In a daring attempt to hone their tailoring skills, Hamas has apparently taken up a new boutique operation aptly named "No Escape, Just Blame." According to an exclusive tip-off from the Israeli War Room that we definitely didn't get whilst downing pints of Guinness in between "urgent" Zoom calls, Hamas is allegedly constructing do-it-yourself roadblocks in Gaza. Their purpose? To prevent Palestinian civilians from getting out of dodge ahead of incoming rocket alerts. In an unfortunate twist of circumstances, these roadblocks -said to be pieced together with chewing gum, leftover falafel, and the shattered dreams of any semblance of peace- coincided with Israel's humanitarian warning of imminent strikes. The warnings were an effort to allow Palestinian civilians to flee and find safety. However, Hamas leadership, in a grand display of 'hold my beer' kind of bravado, chose to ensure civilians had nowhere to run instead. The weekend saw a wave of deadly attacks by the terrorist organization Hamas which resulted in the unfortunate deaths of at least 1,200 Jews. This herd-thinning operation though, inspired Israel to declare war on Hamas - in what can only be described as a reaction that surprised absolutely no one. For those unfamiliar with Hamas, they're the heartwarming folks who have turned placing civilians directly in harm's way into an art form. Achieving a level of insensitivity that most villains would dismiss as bad PR, Hamas' innovative use of human shields has set a high bar in the brutal world of terrorism. Returning to their well-honed strategy of blaming Israel while gambling with innocent lives, Hamas is making a spirited attempt at retaining their title of ‘Heartless Hoodlums of the Year.’ Hamas' previous attempts at rebranding - "Kite Bombs: The Environmentally Friendly Approach to Terrorism" and "Tunnel Networking: It’s Dig or Die, Baby" have both fallen flat. So, it remains to be seen whether the new "No Escape, Just Blame" strategy will prove to be a 'bloody' success or a 'bloody' disaster. One thing is clear though, whether it's a bold move or just plain terrorism, Hamas is boldly travelling down a path where even Lucifer himself won't dare to tread. It looks like we're in for another stellar season of "Hamas: Innovating Despair Since 1987.” Brace yourselves, folks!